Page 54 - 2021 English Magazine - Final
P. 54

JUSTIN:…I have a lot of regrets in high school. I   of the family. That’s why I’ve been calling our rela-                                                               He sat in the old leather chair. It let out a
              wish I hadn’t been screwing around so much. It was   tives more. I’ll always remember where I came from.      SILENT                                                    short yet sharp creaking sound, followed
              fun, but I should’ve done something more produc-  I’ll always be Justin Loh, of the Chong family. Even                                                                  by the falling of debris onto the wooden
              tive. Except for studying. I still think 60 percent of   though technically I’m not a Chong, but you get                                                                floor. The absolute silence of solitariness
              what we study is going to be trash. I wish I could’ve   it. I do want to get a tattoo of that though, or even   music                                                   did not bother him. He glanced down, his
              bettered myself though. Maybe in terms of wisdom,   change my name to that. It’s not a priority, but I do                                                               fingers gripping the smooth black glossy
              knowledge, interacting with people, saying the right   like the idea of it.                                                                                             pen tightly, watching each note make
              things at the right time...social investments... yeah.  SUMMER: Mhm.                                                                                                    its mark on the clean white sheet of the
              SUMMER: So do you enjoy the things you learn in   JUSTIN: Yeah, families can be imperfect, but I’m me                                                                   music score.
              university now?                                  because of them.
              JUSTIN: Yeah, definitely. I would say there are many   SUMMER: Do you have anything to say to the                                                                       His eyes started to water, his ears filled
              interesting things I’ve learned, but most were… rigid.  younger generation here?                                                                                        with the hauntingly melodious voice of

              Like, “ Hey! Just follow the things we teach and we’ll   JUSTIN: I… I’ll say one thing. There are going to be                                                           a familiar yet strange person. He was
              give you full marks!” Especially exams. They should   some people you meet that will stay for a long time.                                                              clearly upset. What was wrong? He didn’t
              be evaluated by the opinion of the person, not just   I once defended a friend against the rules, and by                                                                know either. His heart sank low and hit
              from a teacher’s cheat sheet.                    that I meant shouting at the discipline teacher. That                                                                  rock bottom. One word to describe it all -
              SUMMER: Mhm. Okay. Uh… Let me see which ques-    friend has been a big part of my life from that day                                                                    “Emptiness”. A sigh broke the still silence.
              tions are appropriate to ask.                    onwards. So what if I got a bad record? I got a great
              A long pause.                                    friend! Stay true to your own principles, people grav-                                                                 Slumped in his chair, he gently closed his
              JUSTIN: I used to be good at writing.            itate towards you based on your own values, as the                                                                     heavy eyelids. He wondered why time
              SUMMER: I know, I found your diary.              saying goes, eggs of the same basket… stay in the                                                                      passed so quickly. Wasn’t it just yesterday?
              JUSTIN: Ah, that one. I was really whiny and wimpy. I  same basket (Summer and Justin laugh hysterically).                                                              He felt nothing and pondered his purpose
              sounded like a butt.                             Just know the people in your life may or may not                                                                       again and again. The music sank in, simple,
              SUMMER: No, I actually kind of get it, although it did  make a big difference.                                                                                          innocent, childish lyrics with hidden

              sound like a Diary of a Wimpy Kid rip-off. I’m getting   Another long pause.                                                                                            meanings that seemed to make no sense
              out of the butt phase so I do get it.            SUMMER: Wow.                                                                                                           how he pried and pulled at their strings.
              JUSTIN: Yeah, but I was a special case. Until now I’m   JUSTIN: Yeah, one more thing, if you want to make                                                               His finger stopped momentarily, allowing
              still as mature as a 12-year-old so… Yeah don’t com-  some part of you stand out but the world’s pushing                                                                him to reflect for a moment.
              pare yourself with me.                           it down, making you systematic, try to preserve
              SUMMER: Yeah.                                    some of that. Leave some sort of individuality for                                                                     Every breath felt like a burden. His throat
              JUSTIN: What were you going to ask me?           yourself. Let’s say you put a lot of effort in an es-                                                                  burned, saliva trickling down ever so
              SUMMER: There’s still one more question, but I don’t  say, but just because you didn’t go according to the                                                              slightly, barely enough to quench his thirst.
              know if I can include it in this.                scheme, you get a zero. That’s okay, our validation                                                                    Enough, he decided. His head rested
              JUSTIN: Uh-huh?                                  comes from ourselves. Sure, you could get the                                                                          against the whitewashed wall. Blank.
              SUMMER: What do you think of your family? Espe-  marks, but at the end of the day, your validation                                                                      Colourless. Just like his mind. His
              cially now that you don’t see them that much.    comes from you alone.                                                                                                  eyes began to shut. Slowly, gradually,
              JUSTIN: I’m still the same. I’m still your momma’s   SUMMER: Okay. Stop recording.                                                                                      descending into the darkness. The music
              son, and I’m still your brother. No matter where I   JUSTIN: Stop recording?                                                                                            faded into emptiness.
              go, I’ll always remember where I came from. Like   Justin reaches forward, and the record button dark-

              even if I don’t call home as much because I’m busy, I  ens.                                                                                                             And all was quiet again.
                                                                                                                                                                                      - by Lee Ke Yin
              wouldn’t think of myself as someone who’s not part   And that’s my brother.


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